MY PICK OF THE TOP 5 BUDGET HAUNTED HALLOWEEN HOSTELS

With Halloween fast approaching, here is my pick of the five most haunted hostels across the world... to suit all spooky tastes. Castles, pirate bases, brothels and old prisons may not guarantee the best sleep, but will certainly provide you with an unforgettable stay.

Book them at http://www.hostelbookers.com/

In Ireland, there are apparently lots of ghosts and ghouls around the rural setting of Captain Halpin's Bunkhouse, and the hostel, located in Wicklow, organises special evenings out to go hunt them down. This year, especially for Halloween, there's a Murder Mystery night on the Saturday for all guests and on Monday 31 October they're throwing a traditional Halloween party with apple bobbing and scary story time by the fire. Wicklow's main square is set to turn into a Halloween Haven and the local gaol is even putting on a Halloween Horror Week. Dorm rooms start from $16.60 pp pn.

Loch Lomond Youth Hostel in Scotland is an impressive country house set in the Loch Lomond and Trossachs National Park, with stunning views of Loch Lomond and hills to the east. Guests can feel the ghostly presence as they walk around the grounds and the hostel is said to have its own ghost in permanent residence. The original features of the beautiful building - a sweeping staircase, stained glass window and ballroom - make it look like the perfect setting for a ghostly film. Dorm rooms start from $26 pp pn.

While it may appear tranquil and serene on the surface, 7 Santi ancient monastery is located in the very heart of Florence, home to the infamous poisonings and treacheries of the Borgia family. It certainly gives the Halloween holiday a rather macabre edge. Some also say they have heard the whispers of souls trapped in the 7 Santi convent walls at night. Dorm rooms start from $16.60 pp pn.

In Transylvania, guests can't get much spookier than staying in Nathan's Villa Hostel. It is right in the heart of Count Dracula's home town and next to the UNESCO World Heritage listed Sighisoara Citadel.

The castle is the only one in the world with people still living inside. The actual Nathan's Villa Hostel building is 100 years old - giving it plenty of time to soak up the ghosts and ghouls in the spooky surroundings. The hostel offers lots of trips into the surrounding area, including the 800-year-old oak forest and hiking into the hills. Dorm rooms start at €12 pp pn.


In San Diego, USA Hostels, located near a range of bars and restaurants in the heart of the Gaslamp District, is renowned for housing a brothel in the late 18th century. It is common to hear stories about the lights going on and off without reason, unexplained breezes and more. Also, if you happen to be a fan of old western gunfights at the Ok Corral, this might be the best place for you! It's said that the ghost of Sheriff Wyatt Earp still wanders around seeking revenge for his friend Doc Holliday. Dorm rooms start from $23 pp pn.

HostelBookers, is a leading budget accommodation website in the travel industry not to apply a service charge and, on average, 8.7% cheaper than its nearest competitor. It features over 20,000 hostels, cheap hotels and budget properties on its website in over 3,500 destinations across the world. Follow them on Twitter @PRHostelBookers

The field of insurance sees sisters doin’ it for themselves!

Long considered the realm of bespectacled men with pocket protectors and calculators, now the field of insurance sees sisters doin’ it for themselves!

New Bikini Travel Insurance www.bikinisure.com offers insurance cover designed by women for women ... developed specifically with the female traveller – and the way they travel and things they carry – in mind. Of course, Bikini Travel Insurance covers the things you would expect to see like medical and repatriation cover, cancellation and curtailment and coverage for partners and kids, but it’s the female-skewed specialist items and areas that can be added to this basic service that set this company apart:

• Special Travel Insurance: For all the things “blokesurance” won’t cover, Bikini offers additional cover for items important to the ladies, including their clothes, shoes, handbags, hair straighteners, jewellery and watches. Your Jimmy Choos will be safer than ever before!

• Crisis Response Service: If you found yourself in a destination that was declared unsafe would you want your own personal security detail to come to the rescue? One call to the Bikini Personal Security 24/7 rescue number and that is exactly what will happen. Whether you’ve lost your passport, had your personal security threatened or find yourself in an emergency cash situation as a result of being robbed, Bikini Travel Insurance have security experts on standby to resolve issues – from liaising with local authorities to making arrangements to get you to a place of safety.

• Wedding Packages: Peace of mind during the stress and joy of your wedding is exactly what a woman needs, so Bikini has created Hen Party and Bridelicious packages so that brides-to-be can have fun without the worry.

With the Hen Party package, there is cover for hen party costumes and cameras as well as Bikini-bought drinks for the policy holder if their flight is delayed. Brides get the Bridelicious package and benefit from substantial cover for wedding rings, wedding photos, gifts and wedding attire.

Bikini Travel Insurance offers flexible and tiered policies allowing people to choose the exact amount of cover.

As specialist travel insurers there is also the option of additional coverage for extreme sports, an extensive list of activities, as well as business cover.

When Bikini Travel Insurance launches, its special attention to the plight of the female traveller will be evident. Bikinisure.com Medical Underwriter, Charlotte Lee Field, who designed the policy, comments: “This has been a great opportunity to think hard about travel insurance policies from a female perspective and design-in feminine features that you just can't get elsewhere.”

From November 14th onwards, no woman will want to leave for her holidays without her Bikini (Travel Insurance)!

Web: www.bikinisure.com
Twitter: www.twitter.com/bikiniinsurance

Win a family expedition to the Galapagos Islands

Families dream big about how to spend their precious vacation time...
Now's your chance to win a family expedition to the legendary Galapagos Islands, South America.

TakingtheKids.com, TravelingMom.com and Family Travel Forum have teamed up to make your Big Dream vacation come true aboard the National Geographic Endeavour!

All it takes to win this Dream Big Galapagos Expedition Adventure is some imagination, participation in our online scavenger hunt, and a spirit of adventure.
(luck helps, but participation counts the most)

Experience Galapagos with the Experts: Lindblad Expeditions-National Geographic

Family vacations are more than R&R. They’re about building memories to last a lifetime. Guarantee more of those indelible memories by sharing an amazing cruise adventure to the Galapagos Islands with Lindblad Expeditions-National Geographic, pioneers in exploring Galapagos.

Leave your luxury expedition ship by Zodiac to go ashore and get up close to giant tortoises, marine iguanas, curious sea lions and blue-footed boobies during daily hikes. Kayak, swim and snorkel together as you explore a new island each day of the 9-night/10-day expedition, encountering wildlife that has never developed a fear of humans.

The Lindblad-National Geographic expeditions team knows how to make a family vacation magical. Activities geared specifically to children and teens include a unique expedition photography program with a Lindblad Expeditions-National Geographic certified Photo Instructor, a Crossing the Equator ceremony (yes, you cross the equator on this adventure), scavenger hunts; plus craft programs in which kids can make postcards and memory necklaces from recycled paper, learn knot-tying and enjoy a special pizza & movie night.

The A+ Expedition Leaders and Naturalists’ in-depth understanding of the islands guarantees days steeped in joy, wonder and engaging activities, whether you are 8 or 80.

Galapagos Family Adventure Cruise Specifics

The Families Dream Big Galapagos Expedition aboard the National Geographic Endeavour is a $20,000+ offer valid for two Category 1 cabins, each sleeping two. The giveaway is good for travel between February 1 and April 30, 2012, or September 1 and November 15, 2012, only. Airfare not included. Subject to availability by Lindblad Expeditions and excluding holiday blackouts. Confirmation is given 45 days prior to sailing. May not be combined with other offers; limitations and conditions apply. There is no age restriction, though such a trip may be better suited to children aged 8 and older.

How to Enter the Families Dream Big Contest

There are many ways to enter, by participating in our online scavenger hunt or on social media pages. Remember that no matter where or how you participate, you'll have to verify it by leaving a comment here so it will be considered an entry.


1. The scavenger hunt

Take the scavenger hunt challenge in which you'll visit all three sites, Taking the Kids, TravelingMom and Family Travel Forum, to learn about the Galapagos Islands, interacting with animals, taking great photos, getting a passport in a hurry, saving money when you fly, South American cultures and more!
Click on the questions below, each linked to a story on one of our sites. Read the post for each question, then go to our contest entry page to post your comment or answer. Remember, your comments will only count as an entry if you leave a link to them on TravelingMom.com.
One comment = one entry.
Entries are limited to one comment or answer per question, but write as much as you'd like!
Scavenger hunt questions from Taking the Kids:

Which of these tips will you use or have you used to get better family vacation photos?
Which of these suggestions for getting kids out in nature have you tried or would you like to try?
Which of the animals on this Lindblad North Pole expedition would you most like to see and why?:
Scavenger hunt questions from Family Travel Forum:

Which of the things in this diary would you like to experience and why?
Which of the animals seen on this African safari would you most like to see and why?
Which of these places would you most like to have a sleep over and why?
Scavenger hunt questions from TravelingMom:

What would you say to your spouse in this situation?
Which of the free US city zoos would you most like to visit and why?
Which of these tips for saving money when flying have you used? Do you have other great tips?

2. Join the Conversation on Facebook

Participate on Facebook pages (optional) for more chances to win. Visit Facebook pages and leave a comment there, then post the link to your comment here Limited to four Facebook entries (one per FB page) per day. (To get a link to your post, right click on the date stamp.)

Leave a comment on TravelingMom on Facebook, then come back here to tell us you did.
Leave a comment on Taking the Kids on Facebook, then come back here to tell us you did.
Leave a comment on Family Travel Forum on Facebook, then come back here to tell us you did.
Leave a comment on Lindblad Expeditions on Facebook, then come back here to tell us you did.

3. Help promote the contest

Share the news with friends and family and earn more chances to win.

Post a link to the contest on your Facebook page. Suggested post: Have you dreamed of going to the Galapagos? Enter this contest to win a family dream vacation from Lindblad. http://bit.ly/pbf5lK
Tweet about the contest. Suggested tweet: Win a family vacation to the Galapagos! http://bit.ly/pbf5lK #TMOM #DREAMBIG
After tweeting, right click on the date stamp to get a link to your FB post or tweet, then come back here and record your link in the comment section.
Please note, this is limited to one FB post and one tweet entry per day so we don't spam any of our friends.

4. Join a #TMOM #DREAMBIG Twitter party

During the #TMOM #DREAMBIG party from 9-10pm ET on October 17, 2011, we will talk about travel that allows you to Dream Big. If you tweet at least once on the party, come back here and post a link to that tweet for one additional entry. (Please note: Limited to one Twitter party entry no matter how many times you tweet during the party.)

Families Dream Big Contest Details

By entering the contest, you give permission to share your email address with sponsor, Lindblad Expeditions.

Contest closes at 12:01 am ET November 8, 2011.
Winner will be chosen by random.org on Nov. 9 and notified via email
Winner will have 48 hours to accept the prize. If the prize has not been accepted by the deadline, a new winner will be chosen.
By accepting the prize, winner agrees to allow TravelingMom, Taking the Kids and Family Travel Forum to post publicly his or her name and agrees to supply photos taken during the trip to be posted on all three sites.

Legend Has It... Ancient Cornwall

With The 2012 Summer Olympic Games scheduled to take place in England, I'm starting my review of Britain's most popular holiday spots..

Cornwall is a peninsula of granite, ancient and unspoiled, uncoiling for the best part of 75 miles into the open Atlantic. It is mainland Britain's most southern and western extremity. And as such, it is singularly blessed by climate. Where it touches the eastern edge of the Gulf Stream, it benefits unreservedly. Extremes of hot and cold are virtually unknown here; indeed the mean January temperature compares to many Mediterranean resorts. And for Britain that's really saying something !


LEGEND HAS IT ...

Retaining the highest concentration of ancient sites in Western Europe, evidence of Cornwall's antiquity is apparent wherever you look. Its Celtic place names, standing stones, festivals, hill forts, and 20 cliff castles are eloquent testimony to an eventful past.

Once a Celtic kingdom its last king, Dumgarth, contrived to drown himself in the River Fowey in 878 A.D. The legend of King Arthur here too is circumstantial but significant. Here, it is said, he was born at the still-standing Tintagel Castle, gaunt above the churning Atlantic (maintained by English Heritage it can be reached from the mainland by bridge)

Legend has it that King Arthur received Excalibur from Dozmary Pool and defeated Cornwall's menacing giants. The stories can be traced back to the 11th century. Few places can claim so unusual or romantic a setting. Dozmary, Cornwall's largest freshwater lake, sits in a high remote hollow where valleys from Bodmin Moor run south to the sea. Legend has it that treasure lies beneath and that Giant Jan Tregeagle was sentenced to empty it with a limpet shell.

Inland, on the granite uplands, are desolate stretches of moorland transformed in summer by a blaze of wild heathers and gorse. It is here that widespread archaeological evidences of Iron and Bronze age communities still stand. Among the most ancient and mysterious objects are the quoits, chambered cairns, stone circles, and upright stones. Equally impressive are the courtyard houses of the ancient village of Chysauster and at least 30 superb Iron Age hill forts dating from 500 B.C.

The quoits - ancient burial chambers - consist of several upright stones supporting an enormous horizontal capstone. Originally, these were fancied to be altars of the Druids. Circles of standing stones, such as the Merry Maidens, are said to represent ancient ceremonial meeting places, while ominous holed stones appear to mark entrances to graves. Several holy wells also remain, some with reputed powers, such as at Madron, where users still hang strips of rags on nearby bushes hoping their dreams will come true.

Close by, on a windy hillside at Chysauster, lie the evocative remains of an ancient Romano-Cornish village with the oldest identifiable street in England. The ruins of the eight surviving houses - with their terraced gardens and even the remains of sleeping benches - offer an enduring impression of life here 2,000 years ago. Today Chysauster's only residents are the unusual species of birds that haunt this stretch of coastline and the wild flowers that carpet the ruins.

In an area home to more than 2000 years of continuous mining activity, many more silent memorials remain. When foreign competition brought the collapse of tin and copper mining in the late 19th century, mines were abandoned almost overnight. Mining was so important here that the coolapse nearly destroyed Cornwall's economy. Left to decay, the weathered ruins of failed mines offer a powerful and evocative image of bygone days.




WHERE TO STAY..

With over 47 years experience and over 250 hand-picked and personally inspected properties, Cornish Traditional Cottages www.corncott.com offer self catering holiday accommodation in exceptional locations throughout Cornwall.

DOZMARY POOL BARN, Bodmin, Cornwall (Sleeps 6)

An isolated, and beautifully, renovated granite barn, on the bank of the wild and remote Dozmary Pool. The house is warm and modern inside and furnished to the highest standards. It has three double bedrooms, an open plan sitting room, dining area and kitchen with woodburning stove. There are 2 terraces overlooking the lake, the perfect spot for birdwatchers and water enthusiasts, just 10 metres from the waters edge. Approached by a narrow unmade lane, the fully glazed front door leads directly into the open plan living room with slate tiled floor. There is one ground floor bedroom with a double bed, lovely views of the garden and beyond to the lake, and an en-suite. In one corner of the lounge, an oak staircase leads up to the first floor landing where there are two further bedrooms with twin beds, oak flooring and good views over the lake and the surrounding countryside. The grounds are enclosed and the banks of the lake just a few feet beyond the garden wall. It is possible to launch canoes on Dozmary Pool and there is a natural right to roam on foot over much of the surrounding moorland. Jamaica Inn at Bolventor is 1½m away, and the surrounding villages of Altarnun, Blisland, St Breward and St Cleer all have local shops and pubs. The larger towns of Bodmin and Launceston are about 20 minutes drive.

There's a FREE WEEKS HOLIDAY for anyone that recovers the historic Excalibur sword during their stay at the property…


VARLEY, Treven, Near Tintagel (Sleeps 4-6)

A spacious bungalow set in a large walled garden with extensive sea views out to Glebe Cliff, the surrounding countryside and less than a mile from the medieval village of Tintagel. A light double bedroom, looks out across wide open farmland, and a large kitchen offers panoramic views of the garden and coastline beyond. The property is set in Treven, one of the seven parishes of Tintagel where there is a wide range of shops & pubs, just a short walk to the coastal footpath, and only a few minutes drive to the beach at Trebarwith Strand.


PENDENNIS, Tintagel (Sleeps 6-8)

An Edwardian house with views across fields towards the coast and minutes from the beach at Trebarwith Strand. Set in an elevated position, it has a landscaped hillside garden with a seating area above a WWII air raid shelter. The bedrooms all have natural wood floors and views of the countryside. Downstairs the mosaic tiled hallway leads off to a light & airy sitting room with stripped wood floor, period fireplace and a large bay window looking down the valley to Trebarwith. At the rear of the house is a spacious kitchen with a slate floor, long dining table and decorative range. There is also a childrens’ playroom with table football. Trebarwith Strand is a 20 minute walk by footpath and the Mill House Inn is a stroll downhill. Tintagel boasts shops, pubs & restaurants as well as the mediaeval castle.

To plan a visit, find out more at www.visitcornwall.com

Q&A... What's the Best Way to Cope with Small Kids on a Long Flight?

Way To Go
First off, recognise your children’s needs and interests as your own. Let your children know about your holiday plans. Let them know where you want to go, how you are going to get there and how long it will take. Trace it out on a large map (for younger children you can show them the distance between home and away using a toy car and plane) It will offer them an added sense of security and a btter idea of what to expect from the journey.

Ahhh, now to the eternal question of ‘diversion therapy’ during flights. One of the most frequent queries I get is about the use of sedatives.
An antihistamine is often prescribed solely for its soporific effect - as a mild sedative and occasionally for fractious kids on long and tedious journeys. If you are considering using an oral antihistamine for this purpose you will need to weigh up the advantages against potential contraindications and also be aware that children can react adversely, becoming cranky and overactive if the dose is not right. I experienced this for myself with my own son and it only served to make matters worse. What is more you’ve got to consider the effects of jet-lag used in conjunction with a sedative. If your child sleeps throughout the flight, will this really help him to be ready for bed at the normal time once you arrive at your destination?
A few drops of lavender, chamomile or marjoram oil on a favourite blanket or pillow can help relax a child and help promote restful sleep and has helped ease me through many a flight.

As for ‘Are we there yet?’ syndrome, you can be sure flying isn't as easy as it used to be – seats are much closer together and planes are much fuller. Whilst it is even more of a challenge with little ones there are things you can do to make your time in the air go more smoothly.
In-flight comfort is key, so select your seats wisely, and early. For younger children and babies I swear by the bulkhead seats. Being in the front row provides extra leg room, and no passengers in front of you to kick. Almost every international carrier provides a bassinet (or sky-cot) that attach to the bulkhead for babies under 10kg. You can normally pre-book these cots. if you don’t need a cot you'll need to arrive at check-in early to snag a bulk-head. Among airlines that do pre-assign bulkhead seats, many reserve them only for frequent fliers. Still, it never hurts to ask.
At check-in it is often worth asking for a place with an empty seat between you and your children so as to allow for maximum stretching-out space.
Smart packing is important. First off, prepare for spills. I’ve learned to bring an extra set of clothes for both parent and child and a plastic bag for dirty garments.

A child’s biggest complaint is usually ear pain during take-off and landing. Ease the pressure and bring something to suck or chew on (bottles and pacifiers for little ones)
Order special meals. Ask about special kids' meals - some flights have them, some don't. Order at least 24-hours ahead, but be prepared with sandwiches and some non-mulchy snacks anyway (raisins, carrot sticks, cereal, fruit bars etc..); kids' airline food can be as bad as the grownups'.

Create diversions. Crayons, colouring books, paper, pens, pencils, and children's scissors are invaluable treasures. You can pretty much count on one toy for every hour of the flight. Try pre-wrapping a few trinkets to hand out at melt-down moments. The gifts don't have to be elaborate: the act of unwrapping is usually enough. Another -if desperate - favourite is to fashion an impromptu glove puppet from the sick bag (unused !)
For our slightly older child aged 3, a kid’s personal media player always goes down well as does a disposable camera.

For most kids the anticipation of getting to their holiday destination is more than they can bear. Children have little appreciation of either time or distance. The question mums ask me most is just how to keep them amused, especially during long flights, train rides and car drives.
The reality is how your kids behave on the journey largely depends on their boredom threshold and how well prepared you are to tackle the situation. If you end up getting agitated and bored, the chances are they will too. These tips might just help save the day.

My Must Have Top 5 ploys

1. A disposable, automatic camera for a kid’s eye view of the trip.
2. A portable media player with individual headsets so they can play their own blend of tracks without driving you insane.
3. Reusable vinyl sticker scene-books - when they get bored the stickers also stick on the windows. Also try post-it notes (try neon colours)
4. Every ship has a log book. Why shouldn’t your car/plane/train have one too? Get the kids to note down details of your journey including. each stop you make, the weather, what your crew ate for lunch, your times of departure and arrival etc.…
5. There is no escaping it. Over the age of 4, a hand-held electronic game has to be top of the diversion list.

ALL Time Parent’s Favourites
• Any large, snap together plastic construction bricks, such as stickle bricks, Duplo or Lego (losing one or two won’t be a great loss)
• Hand puppets for their versatility. They are always a mood lifter.
• Bottle of bubbles
• Non-stain, washable colouring pens. Enough said.

ALL Time Toys Best Avoided
• Any irreplaceable favourite which might get left behind (if teddy has to come too, sew a loop of elastic to him that fits snugly around your child’s wrist)
• Toys with a seriously heavy battery consumption.
• Wax crayons (they melt in the heat)
• Play dough which smears, squelches, stains, dries up and cracks.
(a lump of beeswax is better. It doesn’t crack or stick to anything else)
• Talking toys with a mind-numbingly repetitive tone and limited vocabulary.

Best Airports to Be Stuck At.. With Kids in Tow..

London Heathrow www.heathrow-airport-guide.co.uk/childrens-facilities.html
Changi Airport, Singapore www.changiairport.com/at-changi/facilities-and-services
Orlando International Airport www.orlandoairports.net
San Francisco International Airport www.flysfo.com
McCarran International Airport, Las Vegas www.mccarran.com
O'Hare International Airport www.airportterminalmaps.com/chicago-o-hare-airport-terminal-map.html
Denver International Airport www.flydenver.com/
Dallas/Fort Worth International Airport www.dfwairport.com
Seattle/Tacoma International Airport www.portseattle.org/seatac/services/kids.shtml
Hartsfield-Jackson Atlanta International Airport www.atlanta-airport.com
Pittsburgh International airport www.pitairport.com
Detroit Metropolitan Wayne County Airport www.metroairport.com

Heading into Bear - and Bike - country

My latest venture with three kids in tow is to Mammoth, http://www.mammothmountain.com/ a five hour drive north east of Los Angeles. We'll spend the next four days hiking, mountain biking, climbing, fishing, boating.. Oh and bear spotting.

Mammoth Lakes is a relatively young town located in the Inyo National Forest, of Mono County.  The town is surrounded by acres of forest and is bordered by the Ansel Adams and John Muir Wilderness Areas. Yosemite National Park's eastern entrance is located just 32 miles north of town and its short 100-mile drive to the valley floor. The town occupies a site in the southern half of Mono County, a stunningly diverse region of eastern California.  Comprising 3,018 square miles, the County's area is marked by the startling contrast between its eastern and western boundaries. 

Bounded on the west by the Sierra Nevada crest, this region is characterized by its mountains, lakes, streams and forests.  Unlike the gentle, rolling escarpment west of the crest, the eastern slope of the Sierra plunges dramatically to the valley floors. 

The town of Mammoth Lakes is situated in the southwestern, mountainous region of the county,
and many of its trails, campgrounds and roads either abut or cross the crest of the Sierra. 

Not Too Grand For Kids

I'm all up for toddlers on tour – don’t get me wrong. My only problem with sought-after family destinations is that every family wants to go there – and, let's face it, who wants to fly halfway round the world in search of paradise only to share it with every other playground-jaded parent? My trick is to get there before you do.

I test-sample my idea for a family trip with other mums. "Sounds fantastic," they reply. "Where is it?" Clear winner of the "got one over you this time" poll, I slope off to confirm flights for myself and my son to Grand Cayman.

One surprisingly effortless direct flight later, my son and I sweep through the Grand Cayman Beach Suites lobby, past a queue of wilting guests. We make short work of unpacking. Factor 50 suncream, check. Sunglasses, check. Itsy-bitsy swimsuit, check. In less time than it takes to crack a coconut, I am slung in a hammock sipping a cocktail, George ping-ponging his way along the shoreline at Rum Point trying to catch fish in a neon bucket. Brilliant sunshine streaks across the ash-blonde beach like good news. We like what we see.

Still, getting under the skin of a place matters to me and by the next morning I'm gagging to "do" the island. I've all but abandoned my mission by the following sunset, as I finally twig nothing much happens here on Grand Cayman. The island is familial, orderly, strife-free: surprising when you consider its mere 22 miles by four miles is home to some 37,000 people. Surprising, that is, until you discover that this isle (the largest of triplets sprinkled just to the south of Cuba) was uninhabited when it first came under British control in 1655. No natives to subdue or displace. It seems even the ensuing slave labour was limited. Today there is no unemployment, no tax, no depression, no war. No policemen in sight. Less so the lager louts.

With a genuinely tempting, lilting tranquility, everything is mild here on Grand Cayman. It is an island decked out in inoffensive pastels. Even the street names are dignified: Barefoot Beach Road, Paradise Lane, Snooze Lane, Friendly Lane, Dr Roy's Drive. I spy a sign for Deadmans Point. I ask our guide whether some sort of riot had broken out there. "Most unlikely," he replies.

GO TO HELL

The closest we come to infamy is a tiny village curiously named Hell. Back in the 1930s, so the legend goes, a commissioner from England shot at a bird among the pointy black rocks on West Bay, and missed. "Oh Hell!" he exclaimed and so the name stuck.

Hell, though, is little more than a lame, charred bed of limestone and dolomite, merchandised relentlessly by local Lothario Ivan with his must-have "I've Been to Hell" postcards and "How the Devil Are You?" T-shirts.

It is evident that small things are big news on Grand Cayman. Blissfully so. As holidaymakers (and more so as holidaymakers with young children in tow) we are used to being spoiled for choice: the thrill and chaos of endless neon signs wired for our attention; the theme park overkill; the been there, done that, next!

What a difference to have George scrutinise this one tiny speck on the planet under a microscope: where a stroll through the 65-acre Botanic Park, a visit to the Turtle Farm or to the Butterfly Farm takes a good two hours instead of the customary 20 minutes. Where we are conscious of every shade, of every hue, of birdsong striking from the trees like sparks from a hammer.

Pausing to watch a blue iguana cross the road occupies a full half hour as we eye every contour of its grizzled, palpitating frame.

In George Town, the Cayman Islands National Museum painstakingly chronicles its cultural history, one major exhibit devoted to survivors of the islands' storms, another given over to children's dress-up and island plaiting. I push my luck and George responds with boffin-like curiosity.

At Pedro St James, oldest stately house on the island, we tour the cool, mahogany-floored verandas virtually uninterrupted. With so few people around to distract him George announces "history is pretty cool". That, if you know my son, is earth-shaking news.

Grand Cayman’s reefs have played host to tens of thousands of divers a year, yet they remain ravishingly, vibrantly alive. The island is famous for its wall diving – it is perched on the brink of the Continental Shelf where divers come to contemplate a 6,000ft abyss – far too formidable for a landlubber like me. The Atlantis Submarine tour provides an easier compromise. A chance to almost rub noses with a green turtle and a great barracuda. We descend 1,001ft for a sublime taste of canned Caribbean.

Despite a fascination with every creature that swims, dives and ducks, I suffer from an embarrassing snorkeling phobia. George does not. When his childlike tenacity wins me over, I join him aboard a boat bound for Stingray City. Captain Marvin ferries us to a sand bank in North Sound where we stand up to our waists in thrashing rays, while these silky giants mug us for strips of squid doled out by the crew. Twenty minutes later and George is still refusing to get out of the water. Buoyant in his life vest, he bobs on the surface captivated by the gentle audacity of the stingrays. He reckons they are like his pet labrador at home and – providing George doesn't impale himself on the end of a waving tail, I am advised – they're about as harmless.

Determined to pursue something altogether earthier, I drop George off for organised mayhem at the hotel's night camp. I pad back through the oasis of plantation-style clipped lawns, ornate hibiscus and coconut palms. Dressed to dine, the grown-ups are gathering in the Loggia Lounge for cocktails and conch creations. It is like the opening scene from some Noël Coward play in which quirky characters have ostensibly meaningful conversations, yet the real story is what is left unsaid. The waitress giggles; a bowl of peanuts spills over; a barfly orders his third mudslide. Seduction in slow motion.

On Seven Mile beach next morning, a salt-scented breeze whispers among the palms. George skips through the foam, flattening the remnants of sand castles. I read. I doze. It takes me five minutes to get my scrambled head to connect with my hand and summon the waiter over. Island time is catching up with me. Finding pleasure in the things that don't happen is a large part of this island's appeal.

Backpedaling furiously, of course, I'd like to point out this isn't the sort of holiday that would suit everyone. I mean, I've probably said too much already. In fact, just forget I mentioned it. We're planning another visit.

The Facts

Staying There

We opted for the Grand Cayman Beach Suites because of their kid’s camp.
http://www.grand-cayman-beach-suites.com/ Tel: +1 345-949-1234
Also worth considering is the four-star Sunshine Suites in Grand Cayman.
http://www.sunshinesuites.com/
Tel: + 1 345-949-3000

Being There

Stingray City and snorkeling at Coral Gardens and the Barrier Reef with Captain Marvins Watersports (+ 1 345-945-6975). Half-day excursions, seven days a week.
http://www.captainmarvins.com/

The Cayman Turtle Farm (+ 1 345-949-3894). http://www.caymanturtlefarm.com/

The Queen Elizabeth II Botanic Park (+ 1 345-947-3558). www.botanic-park.ky/

Pedro St James National Historic Site (+ 1 345-947-3329). www.pedrostjames.ky/

Cayman Islands National Museum (+ 1 345-949-8368). http://www.museum.ky/

The Butterfly Farm (00 1 345 946 3411). Pay once and enjoy unlimited entry for the duration of your stay.

Consider investing in the Heritage Passport, which offers a savings of 25 % on individual admission prices. The Passport allows visitors entrance to four of the top land-based attractions: Cayman Turtle Farm, Pedro St James National Historic Site, Queen Elizabeth II Botanic Park and the Cayman Islands National Museum.

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